Packing and Leaving

The packers are here, and my room is almost done. It's sad to see everything leave. We'll be staying at the Marriott Grand for 10 nights... It's a nice hotel, but I already miss my room, and no matter what you do to a hotel room (when you don't actually live in one, so Michelle, you don't count) it'll still be almost sterile. It's not that there are white walls, it's rather that there is such an impersonal feeling to the room.
I know what you're going to say. You're thinking: Maggi, who gives a shit?!
But, I guess I'm just sad to be leaving moscow. For four years I have roughed it out here, having to take blow by blow from all the inconsiderate people I know, and now that my room is almost packed I feel like Moscow has become the impersonal place that I first arrived in, rather than the colourful and inviting place that it had formed in my heart.
An idiot babbling, that's what I am. I'm the one who will be remembered for her constant ranting of culture and universal understanding in TOK. I'll be remembered as the person who loved X-files and couldn't keep her trap shut about it, and I'll be remembered as the only Dutch girl who was really truely dutch. However, I won't be remembered for me.
How many people actually remember people for who they really were, rather than what they symoblised or thought, or said? Again there's the impersonal issue. It's sad, depressing, and downright disturbing.
I'm just tired of all the bullshit, but guess what... It doesn't get any better from here. People will forever be lying, and talking about people behind their backs. They have no other lives. I guess that's why they say that the youth is wasted on the young, because when we grow up we just becaome all bullshitted (?).
It's sad....
It reminds me of Dr. Peggs's speech at graduation when he said: "It's life perverse?"